Headtrash Transformation – Perry Marshall

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Does your life have any of these symptoms?

• Do you see friends, family members, and other entrepreneurs taking action and raking in cash and think… Why can’t I ever manage to pull that off?
• Do you find yourself saying or doing embarrassing things when you are with wealthy, famous or influential people – especially people you admire?

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Dear Planet Perry Member,

Does your life have any of these symptoms?

• Do you see friends, family members, and other entrepreneurs taking action and raking in cash and think… Why can’t I ever manage to pull that off?
• Do you find yourself saying or doing embarrassing things when you are with wealthy, famous or influential people – especially people you admire?
• Do you feel itchy or queasy when you ask clients and customers for more money?
• Do you start projects, partnerships, or even businesses…but rarely finish them?
• Does there never seem to be enough money…regardless of how much you earn?
• Does big money elude you…even after years of developing your marketing chops?
• Do business deals always seem to fall through…just as things are looking good?
• Does selling high-ticket products or programs make your palms sweat?
• Does money appear…only to disappear even faster?
• Is your income a roller coaster ride…up and down…with no predictability?

“Sure, Perry, I’ve experienced some of those…but it’s just a matter of luck, hard work, and timing.”

“Eventually my day will come.”

Bad news:

Your day will not come until you realize something about yourself that your closest friends and loved ones can probably see…but you can’t.

It’s headtrash.

How I Tried My Darnedest To Crap on Christmas.

After I started working at my very last job, things were going well.

This had come after a series of brutal jobs, getting fired a few times, and a few years of Amway self-punishment. I can’t express what a relief it was to be doing something that worked.

My goodness, it was the best kind of therapy! To go to work and have people buy stuff from me? To have people call me and want to talk to me on the phone? To be a welcome guest rather than an annoying pest? Heaven.

After I’d been there a few months, the president, Mike, started to like me and value my contributions.

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I could tell Mike was thinking I have to keep this guy around. He took me out to lunch one day and told me that. Point blank. “Perry, what do we need to do to keep you around?”

Then he floored me. He said, “Maybe I should make you the president of the company.”

I nearly defecated right there in the restaurant. There I was, only a year removed from abject sales failure, and the owner of a successful company is telling me I could be president!

Top of the world…for a moment…a new opportunity for sabotage kicked in!

What did being president mean?

Would it mean that my job would be a lot different than it already was? Not necessarily.

But my Inner Orphan answered, “No sir, Perry, you are not qualified for that.”

I wrote a blog post on this topic called The Humility Demon. I had a friend back in my late 20s who got a huge promotion at an insurance company. He says to me and our buddies, “Guys, I am not qualified for this. The new job is way over my head.” He resigned from this position shortly after getting it. And then he spent the next ten years of his life wandering around in the wilderness trying to figure out what he was qualified to do. Which was disastrous.

Looking back on that, I know exactly what happened. Providence placed a nice giant strawberry of favor in his life. Right in the middle of his garden. And he said, I’m not worthy.

In hindsight, he should have said to his employer, “I lack many of the skills to do this job. But I’ll do it if you’ll send me to the proper training…give me a mentor…schedule a meeting between me and a top gun every week to go over things…because this scares me.”)

When Mike offered to make me president, I should have done the same thing. I should have said, “Yeah, that’s great… but let me put a plan together and get back to you, because I want to do this right.”

Then I should have gone scrambling around to locate whatever help I needed to get the job done. Here’s what happened instead:

Because I didn’t trust myself… Nick became my boss.

If you’ve been reading my newsletters for a while, you’ll remember Nick was my arch nemesis at the company.

Soon after Mike offered me the presidency, Nick came sniffing around, courting our company. Eventually, he puts in $150,000 as an angel investor, becomes the operations manager, and now I report to him.

You could almost say he became the president of the company for all practical purposes.

Nick was 15 years older than me. He was a very sharp business man. He knew his stuff. And I felt woefully under-qualified.

So, I traded away my power to Nick…like a subservient little orphan.

We were flying high for the first year. Then Nick started fraying around the edges. One of those unstable personalities who, if you give them too much rope, will eventually hang themselves – and hang everybody else first. He eventually became a total nightmare. And we couldn’t get rid of him because he was a shareholder.

Before things with Nick started going bad, the company was growing 30-50% per year. Our firm was always short on cash because of our fast growth. A “Star Business” as we say today. Plus we were developing a cool new chip and banking on the hope that we would sell the company and make a pretty penny.

I traded some salary for golden handcuffs (stock options) and locked myself in for the long haul. My income concession helped Mike’s cash flow.

As we trudged toward the sale of the company, Nick got nuttier and nuttier. Since I was still a sales guy, I wasn’t privy to the conversations at the top of the company. And more and more I just couldn’t understand what was going on. Every day Nick, Mike and his advisors would have closed-door conversations. And I’m shut out.

Their decisions are making less and less sense to me.

It got so bad that one day three other sales guys and I strutted into Mike’s office on a Friday and demanded that he remove Nick from the sales department…or we were all going to quit. We gave him until Monday to make his decision.

I called a headhunter I knew. And I heard something you’ll seldom hear from a recruiter: “Perry, you should stay put.”

I thought he would tell me, “Perry, there’s lots of better jobs for a sharp guy like you. Why are you putting up with all this crap?” Recruiters do work on commission after all. They never tell you to stay put.

But he pushed back. “Perry, right now isn’t the best time to be out looking for a job. When you don’t understand what the guys in charge are doing and it doesn’t make any sense, a lot of times there are deep levels of confidentiality. You just don’t know everything that’s going on. Hang in there.”

A recruiter telling me to swallow a Tylenol and stay put? Bizarro.

I cooled my jets as best I could. But the Wizard of Oz tornado continued to spin. And as “Christmas” (the sale of the company) approached the cicadas in my head were whirring like chain saws.

I got so addled that I considered going to the president of our German partner company, sitting him down, and telling him, “You have no idea what a mess this company is.” I remember prevaricating one night during a trade show, trying to decide… should I tell Hans-Juergen about this… or not? I finally decided against it.

If I had done it, I would have gotten fired. Instantly. Without a doubt. Game over.

Mike fired Jim, one of our sales guys, because Jim was only contributing to our Wizard of Oz tornado.

I loved Jim, and I was so upset about the firing that I spent an hour in the office on the phone with another sales rep, John, just bitching and moaning about Mike.

“Mike is screwing this up. Mike’s got his head up his ___ on that. Mike this. You know what John? Mike wears polka-dot underwear. I suspect Mike even tortures children for fun.”

I hang up the phone. Guess who’s sitting in the next cubicle over listening to the whole thing?

Yup. Mike.

Yes, of course his face was fire engine red. Not only that, I could hear his temples throbbing. I felt the heat radiating from his back as he marched me into the conference room.

“Perry, what am I going to do with you?! John is supposed to be selling, and you just chewed up an hour of his time bitching!” Mike came within a hair of firing me.

But he didn’t.

A single round of Russian roulette and the chamber comes up empty. Perry, you are a lucky boy.

I don’t know if that was six or nine months, or a year before the company sold. It all became a blur after a while. There were landmines getting tripped every day. Blow up after explosion after tirade. I came within a fingernail of screwing it up.

And when they finally entered the negotiations for the sale, we were all just walking basket cases. Paranoia city.

The nightmare before Christmas.

Somehow I made it through without blowing it all up. And my share of the sale netted me a solid six figures. This not only enabled me to hang out my own shingle and become the Perry Marshall you know today, it gave me a certain amount of breathing space that helped me pour the early foundations well… instead of making all kinds of compromises so many info marketers make.

But, man, did my Inner Orphan conspire against Christmas.

Comedian Marc Maron has achieved some success after a lifetime of addictions and personal demons. He said something that pretty much describes what it felt like to go through the saga I just described. He said, “There are two voices in my head. One voice is whispering ‘don’t screw it up, don’t screw it up.’ And that wouldn’t be so bad, except that the other voice in my head is screaming “LET’S SCREW IT UP!!!”

Dueling Inner Orphans.

Marketing junkies, “biz-oppers” and guru-of-the-month-clubbers jump from one thing to the next before anything comes to fruition.

They’re always ten minutes from triumph. Their Inner Orphans don’t say, “Let’s take it back to the lab for 3 months until it’s perfect.” Their Inner Orphan says, “This feels like it’s about to start working, let’s jump to the next flavor-of-the-month.”

They have bookcases full of Shelf Help. Seventy-two half-read eBooks on their hard drive. Shrink wrap on CDs and DVDs. Dozens of projects 90% done…some tantalizingly close to completion. Nothing carried across the finish line.

The Inner Orphan whispers, “There are no real fathers, so bail on this one and find another foster father before this one lets you down! If something works, it will shatter our orphan paradigm. We can’t have that!”

And, if you’ve got headtrash, you can’t fix it with…

• Hard work
• Will power
• Luck
• Marketing
• The Secret
• Positive Thinking
• Delegation
• Not even 80/20. Headtrash is the 80/20 devil that works against you.

There’s only one way to purge Financial Headtrash. I’ll get to that shortly.

“Inner Perry” Fires “Gung-Ho Perry” and Grabs the Steering Wheel

About eight years ago I was gunning hard, running Mach 2 with my hair on fire, growing my business, putting down roots, and applying appropriate amounts of paranoia and diligence.

Gung-ho Perry was in full control.

But I could feel myself getting tired. Not just “need some sleep” tired, but emotionally tired. Like, “Dang, I need to slow down and get some rest. Maybe take a long vacation. How about a sabbatical?”

I needed to read, re-charge, re-orient myself, and gather my energy for the next surge of creativity.

I was also growing more aware of inner emotional garbage I needed to clean out. I had some, Laura had some; we didn’t know just how much. We did know we’d made an attempt a few years before and ultimately shoved it all back in the closet. Then we got busy with other things.

It was the end of the 2007 Bobsled Run. Business had just reached a point where I could take my foot off the gas and breathe easy for a bit. I vaguely expected that I might take some time off, recharge my batteries and press forward.
Inner Perry had different plans.

No sooner had I hit that “OK you can coast for just a bit” spot than Inner Perry said, “Alrighty now, it’s time for Gung-Ho Perry to shut down so we can make some repairs.”

At ten o’clock on a Thursday morning, it hit. I tumbled into a black hole. I was an erratic emotional mess for about six months. Suddenly everything I’d been shoving down came up. I vomited stuff up for the rest of the year.

This is the kind of spot where a lot of guys buy a Porsche, join a health club, and find themselves a 28-year-old bubbly blonde mistress.

I managed to not do anything quite that stupid. But I was a mess and I became acutely aware of a bunch of problems I’d been ignoring. It was as though whatever anesthetic or denial that was maintaining the peace evaporated. I was unhappy with all kinds of things. And just because you have a successful biz doesn’t automatically fix all the other departments in your life.
I put a bunch of stuff on the back burner and dug in. In some ways it was the hardest kind of work I’d ever done in my life because I was fighting my inner demons.

Shall I list the various approaches I experimented with?

• “Lay on a couch and talk to a shrink” therapy
• Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP)
• EFT “tapping” on acupressure points
• Positive Affirmations
• Left Hand-Right Hand journaling (“non-dominant hand exercises”)
• Theophostic prayer
• Extended group therapy. (I spent a week of total immersion in California with six other people, facilitated by an experienced counselor. We worked on our ‘stuff’. Grueling. Insightful.)
• Sound Therapy
• Energy Healers
• Long, deep, self-indulgent conversations with my friends about our respective “junk”
• Meditation
• Bitching
• Long stretches of prayer, begging and groveling and all that

I’m sure I’ve left out a thing or two, but you get the idea.

Almost all of these things were useful to some degree. But here’s what I learned:

Almost all this stuff has something to do with solving addictive behavior. Compulsive gambling and excessive risk-taking, starting things you never finish, financial self-sabotage, cutting, hair pulling, anorexia, bulimia, drinking, drugs, compulsive eating, casual hookups, endless squirrel cages of accumulating money but never quite having enough, bouncing from relationship to relationship – all these things are ways people try to medicate pain from wounds that never healed.

I can show you the most advanced marketing techniques in the world. But if there’s a rogue program in your head that’s not ready for success, then somehow or another it won’t get done. It won’t even get started, or it’ll get done wrong. Or it’ll get done right but something else will still screw everything up.

You can have a perfect business, but if some virus in your head says “money is evil,” you’ll always find a way to separate yourself from money.

As a “business guru,” I have interacted personally with thousands of people. Worked closely with hundreds. I have immersed myself in the entrepreneurial world for 20 years. So, I can assure you that a person can learn everything they need to know to grow a successful business in 1-3 years.

But if your inner demon wants to murder your success, it doesn’t matter what you learn, the demon always wins in the end.

As I was coming to my realization about inner Headtrash demons, some folks at my church were searching very hard for healing models that would address these precise issues. They, like me, were trying all kinds of stuff.

Before I explain what they found, let me tell you what “it” did.

Not Just Another “Band-Aid” for Your Gaping Head Wound

Laura and I both got a “Sozo” session within a week of each other, then we went on a mini-vacation to Montreal.

On our trip, it became blazingly obvious that Laura’s sleeplessness, depression and a sizable chunk of her Post Traumatic Stress Disorder were gone. Just like that.

It was the best trip we’d had together in 10 years. If not 20. This was like, WOW!!!

It was like having a 30-pound sack of cement strapped to your neck for years, and suddenly realizing it’s melted away and vanished.

It didn’t solve everything. We still had to handle some issues; life wasn’t instantly a bowl of strawberries. But I’ll tell ya what, it was like taking the biggest, nastiest weed and pulling it out by its roots – cleanly and completely, so that it doesn’t grow back.

ALSO: There was not a need to “pry open” Laura’s past, or excavate some dark memory as though we had to crack open some ugly walnut and peer at the inside. Sozo does not involve re-living horrific events or dredging up the past. What it does, instead, is simply reverse whatever lie you believed as the result of the trauma.

It’s not what happened to you that did the real damage. It’s the lie you believed as a result of what happened to you.

As for me, I decided: Rather than succeeding through anger and determination, I wanted to achieve my next level of success through inspiration and imagination.

I was sick and tired of being vaguely upset about all kinds of stuff and not quite knowing why. There are lots of rich, miserable people in the world and I don’t want to be one of them, and trust me – neither do you.

Deep down I sensed: Perry, if you get through this, another season of productivity and prosperity will follow. So I continued to clean out my emotional garbage can. And sure enough, once I cleaned it, the fire in the belly returned.

Plus there was an added bonus:

My Intuition is Sharper than Ever Before

I have a far greater awareness of what is going on inside, a new ability to hear my inner voice and judgment. I started getting comments from my friends about how I seemed to be turning up the heat and grooving in an Über-Productive Zone.

• Since then I’ve written 5 books.
• I’ve started three new businesses.
• I’ve gone from working 10-12 hours per day down to just 4-6.

Wow.

I said to myself: If it’s possible to heal deep emotional wounds from childhood, then it’s possible to heal people’s internal garbage about money and success too.

When you believe lies – financial lies, success lies – you believe them on a spiritual level. And you can’t solve spiritual problems with medication or conversation or marketing acumen! You have to solve them at a deeper level.

“Perry, I’m not so sure this is a Good Idea…”

So, in June 2012, against the advice of some of my closest consigliere, I held a workshop called Financial Sozo for Entrepreneurs in Chicago.

My advisors warned me not to mix business with “spiritual” … at least not in such an overt and public way. “You might alienate some folks with this, dude.”

But, because I had seen such transformative results from Sozo in my personal life…and in the lives of my friends and family…I knew I had to do it.

At this workshop I brought in Dawna De Silva from Redding, California, who pioneered the Sozo™ method for inner healing. I also brought her husband Stephen.

Stephen De Silva wrote the book Money and the Prosperous Soul which may be the best book I’ve ever read that offers a sane spiritual understanding of money and success. He is a Certified Public Accountant and CFO who has worked with Dawna to develop a “Financial Sozo™” version of the Sozo™ process.
And it was a roaring success…

On Day 2 I asked a question. “How many of you woke up this morning and realized that in the aquarium you swim in every day a layer of film had gotten peeled off and you could already see more clearly?”

At least a third of the hands in the room went up. (Less than half had even had their private session, so a LOT was already going on.)

By the end of the seminar, people were coming up to me and thanking me profusely for having hosted the event. Several described overwhelming, “swept my head clean” stories to me. Some became choked with emotion as they struggled to put into words what had happened to them. Others went home with definite next-steps that wouldn’t have been the least bit obvious before the event.

One guy missed the entire first day because of the craziest travel fiasco I’ve ever heard. He got there the second day and had his private session. At lunch he told me it was worth every ounce of effort. He said he’d resolved a long-standing conflict that had baffled him for years.

Adam Libman is a Jewish guy from California. He’s a tax consultant who had all kinds of Jewish heebie-jeebies about coming to a Christian-oriented seminar on Financial Headtrash. All the concerns you would normally expect of that kind of guy going to that kind of event. He and his wife Maria enjoyed it so thoroughly, he wrote an entire 12 page newsletter about it, unsolicited, and sent it to me.

How Can I Transform Your Headtrash Without Making You Fly to Chicago?

Since this landmark event, I’ve been scratching my head trying to figure out how to deliver these powerful results without having to conduct an expensive, time-consuming, travel-muddled live event.

And I think I’ve done it…

Get Headtrash Transformation – Perry Marshall , Only Price $37

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